Allah be merciful on my husband and on myself insha'allah
by Zeena Tabanja
(Youngstown Ohio USA)
I was married only 2 weeks in Islam before I found out the night we consummated our marriage that I conceived a child. At four weeks pregnant he told me to abort the fetus, when I declined this he tried to force me, still I declined this, by week 11 of my pregnancy he poured dish soap on our kitchen floor so I would fall and miscarry.
Alhamdulilallah I caught my balance and me and my unborn child were safe.
At 12 weeks he got so mad and told me to abort the bastard because me nor a baby would mess up his life, that all he wanted from me was a green card.
I didn't even have any idea he didn't have citizenship he never mentioned it and I never thought to ask because he was the first Arab I had dealt with.. I told him right then I was not going to be used for no papers, So he divorced me Islamically with his friends all as his witnesses and to put shame on me, then kicked me out and told me to deal with my little bastard on my own,
That same week he got engaged to another girl and after she found out he had a baby on the way and his job didn't pay as much as she wanted him to be making she left him... 2 weeks after that he came running back to me.
I still stood my ground on not doing his paperwork and he said it was fine..
At this time I was now 22 weeks pregnant. Knowing now I would have a son.
He asked me to marry me through the state to show he is serious about a family.. I waited a few weeks to accept..
so we married and my son was born. he looked at my son and told me to give him to his mother because he didn't want an American to raise his child.. i was angered and kicked him from the hospital room..
He then took my son and myself home, he keep saying put him for adoption and when i said no he crashed the car into a tree. I got out grabbed my son and ran to the home and locked us in my bedroom. He came and apologized.
When my son was 1 month old he was crying and my husband yelled at my son to shut the F*** up. I yelled at him to never raise his voice to my baby and any baby.. he beat me and kicked me and my son out... now i feel trapped in this marriage i am in. He wont get a divorce from me until he is done with his green card stuff, i have called immigration they told me without an alien registration number they cant do anything for me and he has to be issued the green card.. which he has neither yet.. my son is now 6 months old and I do everything on my own for him.. my husband doesn't support him nor me in anyways.
I was wandering if anyone can answer this question.
Can a woman get Islamically married to a Muslim man if she is married on paper but divorced in Islam? The only marriage that there is the paper saying it but in our eyes and to Allah we are no longer husband and wife..
I was purposed by someone who I have know for years who wants to take the role as my sons father, but i do not want to except if I am unable to..
...but this piece of paper from the state is what has me as a wife, not hing else me and my husband have not "been together" since I got pregnant as he thinks pregnant woman are unattractive and "diseased"